Posted by: justj | November 16, 2011

all about friends

I’ve been thinking recently about friends and friendship. I value my friends and value my close friends highly. If it is within my abilities, there isn’t much I wouldn’t do for a friend. Now there are some questionable activities that I won’t consider, but if asked for, or neede, I try to be there for my friends.

I have a few very close friends, a few close friends and then there are friends that I think I should get to know better. Generally, once I decide someone is a friend, to me they will always be my friend. The only consideration, is how close of a friend are they.

I’ve often wondered how others make the determination of a close friend, but I know how I do it. Should be obvious that a person should know how they determine who is a friend and who isn’t, but in the age a Facebook, friends seem to be something to count instead of count on.

My friends are people I trust. I trust them with my secrets, I trust them with my children, I trust them with me. How much trust I give, depends on how trustworthy I deem a person to be. This can change over time, but when the trust is lost, it is difficult do regain.

I wrote something on Facebook that I think is appropriate for this post.

We never really know the depth of our friendships, until we trust our friends when we are in something really deep.

I was going to say “when we are in deep shit.”, but that didn’t sound as philosophical to me. So my thoughts were already in the trust area weren’t they?

And today I wrote

A friend will stand with you when others are against you. A real friend will know what to do with the bodies.

Not really a realistic statement for most people, but in the humor lies the real depths that friendship can take. A friend isn’t always trying to stay on your good side, but they should be willing to have your back, even when you are wrong. If you are wrong, expect them to kick your backside when it needs it. That is one of the true marks of friendship.

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Responses

Can friends be demoted to just acquaintances?

I guess that would be up to you little ladybug.

I feel badly for the people who feel they need to collect friends on FB just to up the number of “friends” they have. It’s like that game going around on FB now – comment on this status about how you met me. If you have so many “friends” on FB that you don’t know how you even met these people, then you are a Facebook friends collector!

Facebook is a place for me to connect with people I know. My house is a place for me to connect with people I like.

Friendship (to me) has always been a finicky thing. It has been in my experience’s that friends come and go, while your real friends stay w/ you no matter what the circumstances or what life brings.

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